That’s what I told my daughter the other day at our favorite café, as I ducked behind a newspaper when an old boyfriend of mine walked in to order coffee to go. (How dare he). He was so close to me I could hear him breathing. I kept my back to him, my hat and glasses on behind the morning newspaper. I didn’t even mention to my daughter that I knew him until we got into our car. Her response when she figured out which guy it was…EWWwww.
He is now one of those old punker guys with skinny jeans, black leather jacket and what appeared to be dyed black hair. EWWWW!!!
Did he really ruin my life?
In my twenties I had had a dream. I sold everything I owned, except for my car, my skiis, and my new Sony TV, to set out on adventure to be a ski bum and work here and there to fund my dream. Everything was going as planned. I had already skied 3 of my 20 mountains I wanted to ski. When he eerily began to write me and whenever he could call and keep me on the phone for hours. Back then we did not have cell phones so I had a big long distance phone bill to settle with whomever I was living with at the time. He made some talk that to a 20 something young woman sounded a lot like a proposal.
The next thing I knew he was in California packing up my car and we made the long trip back up to our home state of Washington.
Within a few months he dropped me and found a new love. I was left with the shame of having to go back to my old job and the loss of my dream life.
I did make it to Utah after I climbed out of the pit of depression and skied Snowbird, Alta, Sundance, and Brighton and Big Mountain in Montana.
But did he really ruin my life?
The fact is that I made the decision to change my life plan. I could have stood the course and told him, “See ya later dude!” I made the decision to burn some bridges by leaving and because of it I lost a close friend and in the end the guy too.
I made a compromise. A compromise is what people do when there is a conflict of dreams and no one gets what they really want. If there is a loving relationship, you make changes that would be most beneficial for the person you love, because you love them. Him coming to California was not in my best interest only his. My leaving was not in the best interest of my friend that I left holding the bill. The love factor had been hastily ignored.
Yes he was a jerk and probably still is. But it was me that made that final decision to give up my own plan for the short lived pleasure of whatever he offered me at the time. I can’t even remember.
Our relationship with food is very similar to this type of relationship. Our craving for that sugary treat, or fast food, or just continuous mindless eating is only a short lived pleasure with disastrous consequences, just like my stupid boyfriend. We think, “Oh yah this is going to be good” and we eat it and mmmmmm it but then a few minutes later it’s gone and we have forgotten what we even like about it.
I don’t care how old you are, it doesn’t take a genius to figure this out. Trust me you don’t have to learn this one for yourself. Don’t give up your dream of reclaiming the body you once had or even losing 10-20 pounds, for the false promise that cookie is giving you.
He is a crumb, a bad cookie, a real sucker.
You get the idea here. Totally not worth giving up all that you have worked so hard for or your dream.
It’s not like you don’t know what the consequences are or that it is a false relationship.
It’s time that you take a stand against stupid boyfriends and bad cookies and get your dream and body back. Stay the course!
In my Happy Weight Loss course I give you all the ammo necessary to defeat these cookie crumbs and suckers so that you can achieve your goals and say,
“Uh um you got ta leave Sucka, Bye bye!” Once and for all.